Genius in London

No great mind had ever existed without a touch of madness – Aristotle

I’m more than confident to say that if Aristotle was alive today the above quote would have been a reference to me.

The Situation

I recently decided to have a little big adventure to the capital of England, London. One of my dislikes is the feeling of being weighed down when walking, it is up there with having to walk around someone’s coffee table they have placed in a small lounge space. It is also why I really dislike having to use a camera bag which, if you ever see me with one it is rarer than seeing me smile.

I’m a firm believer in ‘simple things for simple people’ and to be fair, I do simple very well. My trip involved an overnight stay before attending a ‘Fujiholics Photowalk’ then a journey back up North with my fellow simpletons. So my main task at 23:00 the night before was to prepare for my trip. Prior to this, I was advised to travel light, but light still means the use of a bag, or does it?

Development of a well thought Plan

After what felt like an eternity, ten minutes later I decided that the advantages of Cargo Pants really outweigh those of a bag on an overnight trip, it could even be possible to extend that to two nights maybe three depending on how big your Y-Fronts are.

Let me expand

Cargo Pants have the usual pockets plus a large pocket on the side of each leg. These pockets are large enough to hold Y-Fronts, Jock Straps or women’s knickers if you are that way inclined and toothbrush/travel toothpaste. They can also hold a pair or two of socks in the rear pockets if you don’t mind looking like you have had buttock implants.

My Cargo Pants had additional pockets on the hips which were great for storing a mobile charging bank *no three prong plug sticking in you) and charging cables/headphones in the other hip pocket… The plan is turning into genius.

Every old school man, a proper man’s man, not these modern hipster men all have a well worn, arsed sculptured pair of Y-Fronts which really should be thrown away but still have a month or two life left in them. This formed the second part of my plan, wear these to go down to London then throw away the following day so I didn’t have to bring them back home and also be even lighter on the trip home, the same thing with my socks.

The only thing to consider now is which camera to take? The choice was between a Fujifilm X-T10+35mm lens, X100F or an XQ2. Your image is everything in London, and if you don’t have the image you don’t have respect, so this limited the choice to the X-T10 or X100F, as nice as the XQ2 compact is, a man’s man in London just can’t be taken seriously with a compact. I decided to opt for the X100F, mainly as it was slimmer than the X-T10+35mm lens and from experience, it is considered cool to have one of these hanging around your neck… but ultimately, it also means I didn’t have to bring a camera bag with me!

Still with me?

Ok, maybe at this point you are thinking ‘the world needs more genius people like Richard’ and you are quite right!

Time to put the plan into action and break down the trip.

Loading the car up: Well, I just got in and drove off… I didn’t have to put any bags in the boot of the car

Train station departure lounge: Didn’t have to worry about bag thieves, pick pockets welcome to a lucky dip of Y-Fronts or toothbrush/travel toothpaste.

Train Journey: Running down the platform to get to your seats didn’t involve a drag race with a bag, I didn’t hold up half the carriage trying to squeeze my bag in/out the overhead storage.

By this point, my accompanying travelling simpletons are now very impressed, well one is impressed, the other is trying not to kill me after stirring at him and asking him every five minutes for three hours if he was tired yet.

One thing I didn’t anticipate was developing a Cockney walk due to the uneven but light weight in each cargo pants pocket, as long as I kept my mouth shut, I just looked and walked like every other ‘cockney geezer’ in London.

Arrival at the hotel: No bag to unpack, just empty pockets onto the bed.

I know what you women are thinking, you want my babies, they may not be first in line for looks but they will be blooming first in line for brains.

Ok, as with most plans, they don’t really go exactly to plan. One thing I didn’t factor in is security checks… for example, when you want to visit the Tate Modern, there are security guards checking bags etc… it tends to look a little odd if you empty the contents of your person, firstly the mobile battery charger with all sorts of charging cables hanging out and connected to your phone… the toothpaste also looks rather worrying when you hold that in the same hand as a mobile phone connected to some sort of small black mobile charger with other loose cables hang off it… but ultimately, having to produce Superman Y-Fronts from your pockets is really not something anyone should have to do in front of security guards who are coming to the end of a long hot exhausting day and appear to have no sense of humour